Wedding services and ceremonies in Indonesia are as varied as the citizens who inhabit this vast archipelago – people from over 300 different ethnic groups scattered across 17,000 islands. When we receive a wedding invitation, we know what to expect and how to dress from the family’s ethnic group, religion, social status, and urban or rural domicile.
Pre-Wedding Ethnic Ceremonies
Ethnic ceremonies are often held a day or two before the wedding at the home of the bride or at a hotel ballroom or reception hall. Organized by the families involved, they are usually based on long-standing cultural traditions.
Of the ethnic ceremonies we have attended, the Javanese ones have been the most intricate, mystical, and symbolic. In a complete Javanese ceremony, numerous rituals are followed, including Panggih (meeting of bride and bridegroom), Wiji Dadi (chicken egg crushed by the groom), Kacar Kucur (symbolic gift exchange), Dahar Klimah (symbolic feeding of each other), Sungkeman (blessing from the parents), and Siraman (symbolic bathing).
Ethnic ceremonies in the outer islands may have fewer prescribed rituals to follow but are just as meaningful to the couple and their families. Upon arrival at the house of the bride or reception hall, the groom’s family is warmly welcomed and shown where to sit. The groom is often asked to go inside to search for his bride and bring her out for the celebration – one of the more light-hearted moments of the event. Ethnic ceremonies normally include processions, dances, a short religious service, a blessing of the couple by their parents, and a meal shared by all.
The following pictures taken at pre-wedding ethnic ceremonies in Java and Timor depict some of these activities:
Pre-Wedding Ethnic Ceremonies
Ethnic ceremonies are often held a day or two before the wedding at the home of the bride or at a hotel ballroom or reception hall. Organized by the families involved, they are usually based on long-standing cultural traditions.
Of the ethnic ceremonies we have attended, the Javanese ones have been the most intricate, mystical, and symbolic. In a complete Javanese ceremony, numerous rituals are followed, including Panggih (meeting of bride and bridegroom), Wiji Dadi (chicken egg crushed by the groom), Kacar Kucur (symbolic gift exchange), Dahar Klimah (symbolic feeding of each other), Sungkeman (blessing from the parents), and Siraman (symbolic bathing).
Ethnic ceremonies in the outer islands may have fewer prescribed rituals to follow but are just as meaningful to the couple and their families. Upon arrival at the house of the bride or reception hall, the groom’s family is warmly welcomed and shown where to sit. The groom is often asked to go inside to search for his bride and bring her out for the celebration – one of the more light-hearted moments of the event. Ethnic ceremonies normally include processions, dances, a short religious service, a blessing of the couple by their parents, and a meal shared by all.
The following pictures taken at pre-wedding ethnic ceremonies in Java and Timor depict some of these activities:
Wedding Ceremonies
Marriages may be made in heaven, but in Indonesia they are arranged by a committee made up of relatives and close friends. Because the bride’s parents pay for the wedding, they have the right to decide whatever they like in consultation with the bride and groom as well as other relatives.
One of the first things to be decided is the design of the wedding invitation. Unlike the ordinary straight-forward wedding invitations Westerners are used to, Indonesian invitations are usually large, colorful, and decorative. Some are amazingly creative, made into booklets or printed on objects that can be used by the recipient. Pictured below are several wedding invitations we have received over the last few years:
As one would expect, Indonesian marriage laws are quite conservative and based in religious principles. Indonesia does not recognize same sex marriage or inter-faith marriages. Indonesians are required to embrace one of six recognized religions, and if the bride and groom belong to different religions, one converts to the other before they are married. Nearly all weddings are held in a house of worship. A civil ceremony is also required at which official papers and certificates are signed, and this is often scheduled immediately after the religious service at the same house of worship. Although everyone is invited to both the wedding and the reception, usually only family members and close friends attend the wedding. Most people attend the reception instead.
For most Western weddings, the bride and groom arrive at the ceremony separately. When the bride arrives, she is “given away” by her father or brother and walked down the aisle to the groom who is waiting in front. They exchange rings and vows in front of an officiant and are then proclaimed man and wife. Traditions vary in Indonesia, but at the weddings we have attended, the bride and groom arrive together and are walked down the aisle by their parents to exchange their wedding vows. Some brides wear white wedding gowns, and others wear heavily embroidered traditional wedding outfits. The pictures of Indonesian church weddings that follow show both:
For most Western weddings, the bride and groom arrive at the ceremony separately. When the bride arrives, she is “given away” by her father or brother and walked down the aisle to the groom who is waiting in front. They exchange rings and vows in front of an officiant and are then proclaimed man and wife. Traditions vary in Indonesia, but at the weddings we have attended, the bride and groom arrive together and are walked down the aisle by their parents to exchange their wedding vows. Some brides wear white wedding gowns, and others wear heavily embroidered traditional wedding outfits. The pictures of Indonesian church weddings that follow show both:
Religious and civil ceremonies are usually fairly straight-forward. Receptions, however, tend to be extremely festive occasions and important social events for the entire community. My next post will describe and include pictures of several receptions we have attended, hosted by friends from various ethnic backgrounds in both urban and rural settings.